Lyrics

I Feel Sicle
Unbekannt In Deutschland
4 Fat Guys
This Is What The Brujah Clan Will Do To All You Gangrels
Straight Up Otter Time
Magnetic Shield
Multi-Laired (feat. Toril Lindqvist of Alice in Videoland)
Sun Shy
+8 XP
Loktwarr Danalora
Mermaids vs. Manticores (feat. Sirenne)

From Amanda

Resistanz Festival Soundtrack 2016
One Of The Last Bands Ever To Play Resistanz Festival (We’re #104)

Chica Vampiro

Electrogensis
Code Thief

The Nyarlat Hot EP
Death Touch
On Another Plane

Squid Icarus
Super Scary Action Figure (I Want To Eat Your Brain)
Drop Dead, Squid Face!
Ultrasweaty
I Sniffed the Glove (vs. Cyferdyne)
Give Me One More Chance to Get the Hi-Score, Then We Can Go
Moon Knight is Cool
Black T-Shirt (NIN cover)
Sword Cane
Cthulhu Fhartwagon
Bloodlust Software Was Awesome
This Club Is Closed (feat. Anglespit)

Songs From the De-EP
Show Respect to Aquaman

Kinetik Festival Volume 5.5
3rd Original Kinetik Track (Americans on Rev)

Industrialites & Magic
B-R-[x]-A-N
Save Dat Mermaid
Wearing A Star Trek Uniform, Watching Tony Lechmanski Sleep
Drunk Cuts
Voicebox Botox
My Guy Died (Level 12 Human Sorcerer)
You Have Found the Hawk’s Claw
Wildness Acts
Baby Jesus vs. Baby Genius

VARIOUS ARTISTS: Resistanz
The First Band Ever to Play Resistanz Festival (We’re #1)

Kinetik Festival Volume 3
Holy Shit, We’re Playing Kinetik

Electronic Saviors: Industrial Music to Cure Cancer
Jim, Let Me Know When You Can Drink Again

Sega Lugosi’s Dead
INFL8-R
Second Album Means It’s Too Late to Change Your Band Name
Amphibious Trigonometry
Karma Jolt
Eff the Sun
BAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLSSSS (Prometheus Burning vs. The Gothsicles)
mindFluxFuneral owes me like $100
Nine Dudes Freaking Out
I Thought the CD Player Was Broken…But it was Just a Cyanotic Song (feat. Cyanotic)

Songs in the Key of Death
DEATHKEY

NESferatu
I Can Tell You Shop At Hot(t) Topic
Triple Shot
Konami Code IV
Turn Signals Are Still Cool
One Second Ghost
English License 2.0
Hey, I’ve Got That Font
Mix This Song Into A23’s “Maps of Reality”
Better Versions By Other People

Not on a CD
Everyone Should Play V:TES (‘Cause Somebody’s Gotta Be Worse Than Me) – feat. Ben Peal
Holy Shit, We’re Playing Infest!
Theme From “So You’ve Decided To Become A Goth”

Etherblisster EP
Konami Code III
Devastator
Sonic Boom
Runzmattenweg

+++


+++

  • Unbekannt in Deutschland

    Jetzt auf der Bühne
    Die Electro-Piraten
    Die grossten Streber der Vereinigten Staaten
    Im USA sind alle da bevor der Show beginnt
    Aber da in Deutschland weiss niemand wer wir sind

    Unbekannt in Deutschland

    Wir haben Flüge bezahlt
    Und die Sprache gelernt.
    Und spielen jetzt an einem Ort,
    So weit entfernt
    Vielleicht nicht sofort beim WGT
    Mehr so Parkplatz KDW

    Unbekannt in Deutschland

  • 4 Fat Guys

    electronic hockey in the 1980s
    balances dexterity and heavyweights these
    avatars of alacrity
    and physical prowess
    are available in averages
    of swiftness and power

    skate right
    fist fight

    four fat guys
    four skinny guys
    four medium

    or two fat guys
    and two skinny guys
    or combinations thereof

    four fat guys
    four skinny guys
    or four in between

    differing degrees of strength and speed
    will make up the team

    we’re running out of lyrics at a minute 30 in
    because the premise of this song is embarrassingly thin
    in just a couple of beats, we’ll bring back the chorus
    with the middle guy, the speedy guy and also the tortoise

    skate right
    fist fight
    skate quick
    high sticks

    4 fat guys
    win every time

  • This Is What The Brujah Clan Will Do To All You Gangrels

    this is what the brujah clan will do to all you gangrels

  • Straight Up Otter Time

    Peace out, land
    I’m leaving this scene
    Count me amongst the submarine
    ‘Cause the scientific name of my best friends is
    Pronounced as “Lontra canadensis”

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    From cool to hotter climes
    Straight up otter time

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    Swim through a lotta slime
    Straight up otter time

    I’m hanging with these dudes with subaqueous skills
    And insulated coats for the subaqueous chills
    In colors including white, brown, black and grey
    Hold on to my hand so that you don’t drift away

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    From cool to hotter climes
    Straight up otter time

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    From the salty brine
    Straight up otter time

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    From cool to hotter climes
    Straight up otter time

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    Skateboarding’s not a crime
    Straight up otter time

    Their eyes are shielded from the lake
    By membranes that nictitate
    Their habitats tend to be varied:
    Swamplands, woodlands, estuaries

    They inhabit rocky shores
    And are mostly carnivores
    But sometimes eat aquatic plants
    C’mon everybody, do the otter dance

    Do the otter dance

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    From cool to hotter climes
    Straight up otter time

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    We’re throwing rotten limes
    Straight up otter time

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    From cool to hotter climes
    Straight up otter time

    Let’s see some friends of mine
    The underwater kind
    I’ve taught a paradigm
    Straight up otter time

  • Magnetic Shield

    amongst these mountains
    you decide to battle me
    i’m buying bullets
    while you buy all the batteries
    i think i’m putting you upon the path of danger
    but you got the power ‘cause i can’t see your angle

    (your) Magnetic shield
    You keep me out with an electric field
    (your) Magnetic shield
    You turn back my attack with an electrical field

    i’m arming ordnance to elicit MIRV damage
    you respond with funky bombs that multiply, so i savage
    ly lock the target and adjust for wind direction
    but i did not calculate the force of your deflection

    (your) Magnetic shield
    You keep me out with an electric field
    (your) Magnetic shield
    You turn back my attack with an electrical field

    (your) Magnetic shield
    You keep me out with an electric field
    (your) Magnetic shield
    You repel the incoming shells with the nuclear yield

  • Multi-Laired (feat. Toril Lindqvist of Alice in Videoland)

    you don’t have a prayer

    we’re multi-laired

    you’ll be ensnared

    we’re multi-laired

    i’ve got a tomb of horrors and hall of doom
    a technodrome and a panic room
    secret passageways, ramparts and a moat
    and all the treasure is trapped, so i know that you don’t
    have a prayer

    i’ve got a black pyramid and a neutral zone
    with a skull motif on my iron throne
    and all the underwater exits are guarded by boats
    you can’t escape through the vents, so i know that you don’t
    have a prayer

    chicagooooo

    one hideout has the hand grenades
    one has got the garden maze
    one’s equipped with missle turrets
    one’s guarded by abyssal demons
    not a single reason to be scared
    there’s more than one, we’re multi-laired

  • Sun Shy

    dragging on throughout the day
    all my strength is sapped away
    i just wanna hit the hay
    and stray from the waking world

    but when it’s dark, I come alive
    all my systems come online
    the night is when I energize
    and rise when the day’s adjourned

    i defy the nuclei that strike the sky from space
    when the sun turns off we
    fire up the coffee
    and the synthesizers
    and cubase

    we stay up late
    and we percolate
    and we oscillate

    in the lightless nightshift

    we shun the sun

    i’m justified
    just stepping outside
    in cimmerian skies

    in the lightless nightshift

    we shun the sun

    don’t wanna dominate the world
    instead, I’ll take the zoo
    and party with the polar bears and the kangaroos
    ‘cause all the coolest critters congregate nocturnally
    and I’m the coolest cat in town, so they’ve all heard of me

    but let’s submerge when we converge to escape this cruel candescence
    ‘cause i don’t need the sun to see with bioluminescence

  • +8 XP

    I don’t know if you recall, but I remember it well
    We were in a random chat room on irc
    I sent you some of my music over the DSL
    You said it was cool and that meant a lot to me
    ‘Cause five years later, we’re both rocking the scene
    Discussing arpeggiators in festival green
    Rooms and
    I don’t know if i can thank you guys enough
    ‘Cause i only got this far by studying your stuff

    Very important to me
    +8 XP
    Providing protocol, developmentally
    +8 XP

    Analyzing structures and processes
    +8 XP

    And when the beat erupts,
    I level up

    +8
    +8 xp

    Albums and remixes each better than the last ‘cause you said your favorite track was the next one
    Turning up the bass (“base” GET IT?) with every dancefloor smash beyond a ten like it was hexadecimal
    This is not a call to action to reform the band
    I understand how it gets when you need to move on
    But i do think it’s worth
    Expressing in verse
    That i think you guys made a bunch of really great songs

  • Loktwarr Danalora

    conjuring conduit for causing metamorphosis
    arcane catalyst for this corporeal contortionist
    altering appearances, although the change is torturous
    with my might & magic, we’ll penetrate these fortresses

  • Mermaids vs. Manticores (feat. Sirenne)

    first vampires fought the werewolves
    then demons and gargoyles fought frankenstein
    now prepare for the next epic battle
    of the mythological kind

    hominin head
    leonine torso
    manticores abhor remorse no
    one escapes when we take flight
    our tails are armed with stalactites

    mermaids
    kill with a kiss
    drag you down into the abyss

    manticores
    mermaids
    face two new monster brigades

    mermaids
    manticores
    phase three of the monster wars

    phase three of the monster wars

    phase three of the monster wars

    beautiful bait
    for a maritime trap
    these iron maidens
    are on the attack
    succumb to the siren song of the sea
    less S.O.S., more R.I.P.

    manticores won’t fall for
    your high seas harassment
    especially the scorpion variant

  • From Amanda

    This one’s for you, Seth!

    It’s from Amanda!

    She started hitting the club to hear you spin
    Then you ran a game where she was the paladin and
    Now your lady wants to make an inquiry
    And got the best band in town to do so musically

    A question for Seth
    From Amanda
    Will you marry me?

    Be my Batman
    My Green Lantern
    Will you marry me?

    This is a for-real marriage proposal!

    You lift my spirits like a levitation spell
    I’ll defend you from the bugbears and ne’er-do-wells
    This party only needs me and my counterpart
    No thief required
    ‘Cause you already stole my heart

    A question for Seth
    From Amanda
    Will you marry me?

    The song is done now
    So what’s the answer
    Will you marry me?

  • One Of The Last Bands Ever To Play Resistanz Festival (We’re #104)

    the circle is complete
    now we are the masters
    ‘cause when we repeat
    we’ll be one of the last ones
    to ever rock industrial light and magic
    comin’ back stronger than you could possibly imagine

    we’re number 1
    hundred and 4
    all aboard for the ocean-floor troubadours

    we’re number 1
    hundred and 4
    one more resistanz, for then they’ll be no more
    still #1
    still #1

    a page from the story of the origin
    evolving into auditory champions
    to achieve final form inside corporation
    thank you, sheffield (especially phyll and leighton)

    we’re number 1
    hundred and 4
    all aboard for the ocean-floor troubadours

    we’re number 1
    I’m hundred and 4
    one more resistanz, for then they’ll be no more
    still #1
    still #1

    we were #1
    we were #1

  • Chica Vampiro

    (Rodney Anonymous and MC Lars wrote these.)

    Saturday, one o’clock
    I turn the TV to Mondo Fox
    There’s a show I’ve got to watch
    There’s a show that just plain rocks
    A high school girl named Daisy O’Brien
    Who’s also a vampire; I ain’t lyin’
    The acting is better than Robert De Niro
    It’s time to watch

    Chica Vampiro

    Everybody did a grave, dig a grave

    Reruns of Buffy can be OK
    But I just can’t watch them every day
    Not when there’s so much at stake
    So drop that hero – get with a zero
    It’s time to watch

    Chica Vampiro

    [MC LARS] Chica Vampiro, me gusta mucho
    Telenovela, amor y justo
    Colombian hit, ninos pequenos
    Scaring their parents and haunting their sueños
    Max de la Torre puede bailar
    cuando Ulises O’Brian is far
    Twilight it’s not, but still rocks the spot
    Chica Vampiro, voy a mirar a lot

  • Death Touch

    the army’s on its way
    to stop your kumite
    but you must qualify
    for honor in your master’s eye

    i’ve seen you take a hit
    and even kick the splits
    but entry is not based on kicks
    you must first make tricks with bricks

    be
    the best you can be
    you’ve arrived
    now fight to survive

    death touch
    don’t worry, it won’t hurt much
    after going numb from being punched in the nuts

    superior to the one inch punch
    piledriver and camel clutch

    now you’ve made it in
    the tournament begins
    he says that you are next
    then caps it with a flex of pecs

    and then that very guy
    throws powder in your eyes
    have a flashback to be reminded
    how to fight when you’ve been blinded

    be
    the best you can be
    you’ve arrived
    now break the record time

  • On Another Plane

    you and me make a maze
    we deconstruct with a crane
    we set the whole world ablaze
    on another plane
  • Super Scary Action Figure (I Want To Eat Your Brain)

    on the shelves of powers comics
    way up in green bay
    i found a guy that i’d been looking for since back in the day
    a pliable maniacal alien creature
    with a slimey living web and the power of speech
    eradicate the spider-man
    is what we’re gonna do
    i want to grab you by the arms and legs and tear you in two
    i want to get inside your head like a psychic stain
    i want to
    i want to

    i want to eat your brain
    i want to eat your brain
    i want to eat your brain
    i want to eat your brain
    severed at the head and rent in twain
    a doppelganger’s dead with disconnected remains
    i want to eat your brain

    monochromatic monster
    from outer space
    shooting stuff out my hands
    and saying words out my face
    actually they come from a box on my back
    with color coded buttons, so you can keep track
    of all the scary soundbytes and phrases i speak
    try recalling me when i knock you into next week

    i want to eat your brain
    i want to eat your brain
    i want to eat your brain
    i want to eat your brain
    severed at the head and rent in twain
    crack open the cranium, see what it contains
    i want you to
    [DIE, SPIDER-MAN]

  • Drop Dead, Squid Face!

    rising up ’cause the stars say it’s time
    sinking back at the sight of the sign

    waking when the dreams start to change
    death dies when the aeons are strange

    DROP DEAD, SQUID FACE!

  • Ultrasweaty

    ten minutes into the set
    and we’re already drenched
    from being covered in sweat
    because we get so intense

    oh yeah, we cook up beats for breakfast
    then burn those calories
    so you can feel the wetness
    coming from the energy

    we got on beverage on
    so get your body ready
    we get ultrasweaty

    we’re eating energon
    so keep the rhythm steady
    we get ultrasweaty

    twelve minutes into the set
    and we get waterlogged
    from being covered in sweat
    from the hair of the dog

    oh yeah we cook up beats for dinner
    then store up the power
    and release it all on stage
    in a gothsicle shower

  • I Sniffed the Glove (vs. Cyferdyne)

    Playing Sheffield’s Corporation
    On stage set to thrill
    With PCP Principle
    And Cyferdyne on the bill
    But the Cyfer guys needed
    An olfactory lift
    Went back into green room
    To find out that the glove was sniffed

    I sniffed the glove

    We sing serious songs
    About serious stuff
    We’re a serious band
    Making jokes about spuff

    We played with The Gothsicles
    Down at corporation
    They said that we could sniff the glove
    So we did, no hesitation.

    Soaking up the sweat of my industrial stank
    With a scent to bowl you over like a dinosaur tank
    Taking damage over time from the senses assailed
    When poisonous vapors
    From the glove are inhaled

    It’s so intoxicating
    Drink it in like River Phoenix
    We only wrote the last line
    So that we could say the word “dicks”

    And the stink doesn’t stop
    With what I wear on my hand
    Because I am known far and wide
    Throughout the land
    As a natural resource
    Of critical mass
    ‘Cause I can power a city
    With methane gas

    I just need to quickly go to the toilet
    Don’t worry, I’ll be back
    Wait, what, we-we’re on now?
    UH! This is Cyferdyne and The Gothsicles!
    DO IT! DO IT NOOOOOOW!!!!

    You should have told me that it smelt so nasty
    I sniffed so hard I need a rhinoplasty
    You gave me all those drinks and then you took advantage
    Teasing us with, that Chicago meat sandwich
    Feeling violated, feeling totally used
    With all the time we’ve spent a part, we’ve all got the blues
    We think that you don’t love us
    We think that you don’t care
    We post your pics on Facebook and you don’t even share

    Gonna go back to England
    And then I’m gonna getcha
    Your vocals are like Hocico
    Beat up by Ke$ha
    Your rhyme is in the shell
    Mine are totally ample
    10 minutes left of Watchmen
    That you didn’t sample

    Eye make-up, ties and suits
    And album covers stolen from Crysis 2
    Autotuned to insane level
    Feel the burn, you dorks forever

    You spit rhymes like Shakespeare
    But a Shakespeare who likes toys
    Is your sound original? Or a rip off Beastie Boys?
    Too busy saving mermaids, or getting drunk cuts
    You drop beats like a juggler, who totally sucks

    You’ve got thick thumbs, like fat girls thighs
    Nintendo masturbation will damage your eyes
    We’ve run out of trash, ‘cause you’re such a nice guy
    But F.Y.I. 8 Bit died.

    Also, just for your information, we don’t use auto-tune at all, so thank
    you

    I sniffed the glove and I liked it
    The smell of your sweaty fingers

    I sniffed the glove just to try it
    And I think I just don’t mind it
    We’re English for god’s sake!

  • Give Me One More Chance to Get the Hi-Score, Then We Can Go

    you know we played all the games in this vintage arcade
    like golden axe and streets of rage
    but i got pac-man’s high score in my sights
    one more thing to do tonight

    one more
    high score
    shot and if not,
    baby, let me get the door

    one more
    high score
    try & if i die
    we’ll come back another time

    one more
    high score
    shot and if not,
    baby, let me get the door

    one more
    high score
    attempt
    it’s intense
    baby, loan me 25 cents

    gimme 25

    we played heavy barrel in two player mode
    but arcade style contra doesn’t take the code

    we hit the pinball version of doctor who
    and then annihilated at street fighter ii

    and we destroyed at rampage, got all the way to des moines
    then ran out of change ’cause the thing ran out of coins

    be the benefactor of this ascent

    "U&I" at the top of the list
    is my intent

  • Moon Knight Is Cool

    i love cosmic adventures and high powered endeavors
    but the raddest stuff in town is going down at street level
    not a huge hulking bruiser or lightning bolt blaster
    just a dude with an attitude
    sporting alabaster

    pick a crescent from your spine
    (moon knight is cool)
    you can see him coming by design
    (moon knight is cool)
    vengeance has a new redeemer
    (moon knight is cool)
    broken arms and shattered femurs
    (moon knight is cool)

    he’s got tons of money
    and a sidekick who’s french and
    he once took on nefaria including the henchmen
    if you look at the contents of my bookshelf
    you’ll find it’s got more issues than marc spector’s mental health

    pick a crescent from your spine
    you can see him coming by design
    vengeance has a new enforcer
    broken arms on broken torsos

    pick a crescent from your derrière
    you can see him coming from everywhere
    vengeance has a new avatar
    doling out the moon shaped forehead scars

    helicopters
    and bolo guns
    it’s like 3 batmans for the price of one
    ‘cause the best party’s always on the b-list
    spinning some nunchucks
    and throwing a spiked fist

    moon knight is cool
    (leaving fat lips every lunar eclipse)
    moon knight is cool
    (covered in corporate blood and werewolf drool)

    all beware the fist of khonshu
    you could read something else, but you wouldn’t want to

  • Black T-Shirt (NIN cover)

    i buy my black shirts from h&m
    they’re 10 bucks a pop, i got like 20 of them
    but american apparel always gets me the sex
    ‘cause those tight black t-shirts hella show off my pecs

    black
    t-shirt
    the cornerstone of all industrial merch
    black
    t-shirt
    it always look clean ‘cause you can’t see the dirt

    black summer cuts and v-necks
    and polyblend weaves
    i had the lady at the dry cleaners take off the sleeves
    being that i’m totally ripped
    try to get me in a white shirt and i’ll give you the slip

    and i’ll stock up on the 3 packs from calvin klein too
    ‘cause three for under thirty is a good value
    on a

  • Sword Cane

    old man, i don’t wanna fight you
    there’s a blade housed in your walking stick
    i can tell that your frailty is fake
    your reflexes are much too quick
    i don’t know if you’re a super villain
    or a stately menacing guy
    but i know that if i battle you
    i’ll get a puncture wound in my thigh

    you have a sword cane

    old man, it’s obvious
    that you’re adept at that weapon you wield
    but i surmise that your strength is in surprise
    for the weapon itself is concealed

  • Cthulhu Fhartwagon

    my brother lends me his van
    when we go on the road
    where we get hella bad gas
    from drinking beer by the buttload
    we decided that the vehicle
    was called the fartwagon
    because we leave it stinky
    and horrible like dagon

    there’s tons of weird stuff in my brother’s van
    a single high heel and an empty paint can
    a bass amp wrapped in my parents old sheets
    and 50 cdrs of super crappy hip hop beats

    iä iä
    a van full of farts
    the steering wheel locks up
    it takes an hour to start
    iä iä
    cthulhu fhartwagon
    equal parts octopus, toyota, dragon

    here’s more weird stuff
    that we found in the van
    a glass with the inscription: “all american sports fan”
    coloring books and six bucks in change
    the mythos of this van has made me deranged

    more numerous than young from the black goat of the woods
    are the various containers of consumable goods
    like a terrifying vista of reality
    a mobile shrine to our gastronomic malady

    iä iä
    a van full of farts
    the steering wheel locks up
    it takes an hour to start
    iä iä
    cthulhu fhartwagon
    equal parts octopus, toyota, dragon

    iä iä
    a van full of farts
    the steering wheel locks up
    it takes an hour to start
    iä iä
    cthulhu fhartwagon
    equal parts octopus, toyota, dragon

    iä iä
    it smells super bad
    abdul alhazred took a whiff
    and then he went mad

    iä iä
    cthulhu fhartwagon
    throw the keyboards
    and the green cable bag in

  • Bloodlust Software Was Awesome

    strip mall
    milwaukee
    a shareware rack
    a 3.5 inch floppy encased in shrink wrap

    took out my wallet and said
    here, i’ll take this
    then proceeded to install it on my 386

    switched from expanded to extended memory
    and after sorting out the RAM I see
    a digital display of unspeakable gore
    hook up the modem to the phone because I gotta get more

    we must
    knock the noggins around

    adjust
    the screwed up settings for sound

    blades thrust
    leaving limbs on the ground

    flesh by the pound

    encrusted in the lust

    quit to dos
    and load up a game

    then toss
    about heads of the maimed

    the last boss
    is a takar named staine

    the threat is sussed
    encrusted in bloodlust

    my addiction to their output grew like a virus
    ‘cause they were weird and maladjusted just like i was
    with cool enemies and characters by the dozen
    the games were for PC, but the content sure wasn’t
    i’m not even talkin’ ‘bout the emulators
    despite them being as great as they were
    studies can’t confirm any effects on consumers
    but I grew up all gothic with a sick sense of humor

  • This Club is Closed (feat. Angelspit)

    this time i’m gonna use my powers for good
    and provide a public service to the neighborhood
    since i am rather adept
    at clearing the floor
    it makes sense for me to tell you that it’s time to find the door

    the club is closed
    the club is closed
    exit the premises
    the club is closed
    the club is closed
    leave the property

    exit the premises
    this club is closed

    we hit verse two and you’re still here
    so stop with the dancing and finish your beer
    ‘cause now we’ve reached the last call
    for you to hook up
    but you can’t get it on in here
    so it’s time to leave the club

    the club is closed
    the club is closed
    exit the premises
    the club is closed
    the club is closed
    leave the property

    exit the premises
    take it from me
    you don’t want the assist

  • Code Thief

    You’re stealing data on which to subsist
    You’re not a hero, you’re just a plagiarist
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    Pilfered programming is how you exist
    You’re not a hero, you’re just a plagiarist
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    I’ve seen your code and the security’s weak
    You’re gushing bubble lead out of a memory leak
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    You couldn’t pass a computer class at DeVry
    Your code sucks ass and that’s the reason why
    You take all your tricks from the guys dismantle
    What happens when you reach exceptions you can’t handle

    Your bios protocols belong in a trash can
    Forget the guy with sticky bombs, you’re the Crash Man

    You’re stealing data on which to subsist
    You’re not a hero, you’re just a plagiarist
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    Pilfered programming is how you exist
    You’re not a hero, you’re just a plagiarist
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    I’ve seen your code and the security’s weak
    You’re gushing bubble lead out of a memory leak
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    code thief x2

    Incorporate the info in your core
    Hope it won’t corrupt your data store
    But It changes the color of your carapace
    That’s one hell of an interface

    You’ve fought Dr. Wiley so many times, it’s like the jail cell door is rotating
    Maybe if you got it right on the first try, you wouldn’t need all the updating

    You’re stealing data on which to subsist
    You’re not a hero, you’re just a plagiarist
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    Pilfered programming is how you exist
    You’re not a hero, you’re just a plagiarist
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    I’ve seen your code and the security’s weak
    You’re gushing bubble lead out of a memory leak
    I’ve know your game
    You’re a code thief

    code thief x2

  • Show Respect to Aquaman
    Make way for the underwater royalty
    King of Atlantis and the Seven Seas

    Sometimes sporting a beard, sometimes clean shaven
    He’s the one you call when the day needs savin’
    Who cares if all his powers are water based?
    He can punch evil right in the face
    Who cares if he occasionally rides a seahorse
    When the ocean’s in trouble, there’s only one recourse
    Show respect to Aquaman
    Super cool, super powered and in demand
    ‘Cause every time a crazy situation gets drastic he
    Communicates with sea life telepathically
    Aquaman
    Aquaman
    You only think he’s useless if you’re stuck on the land
    Black Manta, Fisherman, and Ocean Master
    All get put down when he swims into action
    Who cares if he likes to hang out with walruses
    His orange scale armor is the peak of flawlessness
    Who cares if he can talk to fishes
    He’s got bulletproof skin and that trident is vicious
    Show respect to Aquaman
    He’s so hardcore, he cut off his own hand
    It got replaced with a prosthetic harpoon
    But they retconned that in the New 52

  • 3rd Original Kinetik Track (Americans on Rev)
    our toronto debut, care of isn
    getting ready for the show when someone hands me a can
    or maybe it was more like a clear plastic bottle
    can’t remember ‘cause i took a sip and then i went full throttle
    at first i’m like “hey, where’s the party at?”
    at then i’m like “i think i’m going cardiac”
    i don’t know how long canada’s had this shit
    but that night was the first night that we’d heard of it
    americans on rev
    chicagoans out their heads
    someone put a fifth of bacardi
    in my redbull
    the hangover is dreadful
    detroit diesel
    skylight glare and aliceffeckt
    all put on awesome sets
    and then we were up next
    we took the stage with blue lips and shaking hands
    and rocked with the force one million industrial bands
    then afterwards collapsed on the floor in a mess
    thanks for the ride home to ‘for all the emptiness’
    a
    cautionary tale
    to you my friend
    stick with boreale
    you’ll thank me in the end
    americans on rev
    chicagoans out their heads
    someone all the alcohol
    in my redbull
    the hangover is dreadful
  • B-R-[x]-A-N
    Two dudes on the scene
    Tattoos of machines
    Mixing Diet RC with a fifth of
    Jim Beam
    Jim’s a cool name
    But when I say “Bryan”
    The ladies line up
    With my code compilin’
    ‘Cause the letters that I use
    To write my name out
    Are cooler than the booze
    Flowin’ out of the spout
    I disbelieve
    The rhymes you weave
    Enjoy a reprieve
    ‘Cause here’s how it’s gonna…
    B-R-I-A-N
    You spell that all messed up
    When the chorus comes
    You can try it again
    B-R-Y-A-N
    Why’s it got a Y
    When the I I got is better by times ten
    B-R-I-A-N
    You spell that all messed up
    When the chorus comes
    You can try it again
    B-R-Y-A-N
    Why’s it got a Y
    When the I I got is better by millions
    Two syllables and three consonants
    And the vowels I empower
    Make lots of sense
    An I and then an A
    Is the one and only way
    That I’ll ever recognize
    The spelling of the name
    That’s heresy
    Total blasphemy
    The absence of a Y is a catastrophe
    Y is a vowel and consonant
    Y is the letter that pays my rent
    B-R-I-A-N
    B-R-Y-A-N
  • Save Dat Mermaid
    No police
    Or this underwater beast
    Gets both beheaded and filleted
    I’ve got no idea
    Who this fishy mistress is
    But such is the trap I’ve laid
    Your family’s captured, too

    But they’ve got less to do
    Than this random chick of the sea
    You beat me in round one
    But this is round two
    And you’ll never make it to round three
    Unless there’s
    A yo-yo strike to take down a gangster
    A snake fight, so take up the slingshot
    A solo mission with no eskimo accolades
    ‘Til the way is clear
    Save dat mermaid
    Can’t find the vine down which I’m ‘sposed to climb
    I have a hammer, but only on the inside
    Tests of strength and of mind all serve to hide the way
    But the goal is clear
    Save dat mermaid
    No need to be afeared
    I’ll rescue you
    With my scuba gear
    And that cool spear shooting gun
    I’m staying overnight at the Radisson
    Everyone will cheer
    When I rescue you with my scuba gear
    You’ll be one rescued ass mermaid
    And I’ll be wearing scuba gear
    A yo-yo strike to take down a gangster
    A snake fight, so take up the slingshot
    A solo mission with no eskimo accolades
    ‘Til the way is clear
    Save dat mermaid
    Can’t find the vine down which I’m ‘sposed to climb
    I have a hammer, but only on the inside
    Tests of strength and of mind all serve to hide the way
    But the goal is clear
    Save dat mermaid
    A yo-yo strike to take down a gangster
    A fuckin’ snake, so boomerang the blindspot
    A solo mission with no eskimo accolades
    ‘Til the way is clear
    Save dat mermaid
    Can’t find the vine down which I’m ‘sposed to climb
    Slappin’ old men because it makes me feel fine
    Tests of strength and of mind all serve to hide the way
    But the goal is clear
    Save dat mermaid
    That game was fucking hard
  • Wearing A Star Trek Uniform, Watching Tony Lechmanksi Sleep
    Ego Likeness was gonna stay at my place
    I like those guys a lot
    And their music is ace
    Donna has a voice from outer space
    And Steven has a cool beard on his face
    But Dave called up
    And this is what he said
    “Bella Morte is crashing with you guys instead”
    The band came over
    And they were super cool guys
    But one of them was slated for a surprise
    He plays guitar for Bella Morte
    And his name is Tony Lechmanski
    At night I put on a Star Trek uniform
    And watch the man sleep
    Okay, that only happened once
    ‘Cause he was only at my place one time
    But Tony, you’re welcome whenever
    I’ll read you fan fic about Seven of Nine
    He looked so precious
    When he was alseep
    Like a little punk rock angel
    Or an itty bitty tribble
    Or a baby gorn
    Or a Jesus in a mangerAt one point in the night
    He opened his eyes
    And I thought he was gonna get mean
    But I just backed into my room
    And whispered “This is all a dream”
    He plays guitar for Bella Morte
    And his name is Tony Lechmanski
    At night I put on a Star Trek uniform
    And watch the man sleep
    Okay, that only happened once
    ‘Cause he was only at my place one time
    But Tony, you’re welcome whenever
    We’ll write fan fic about Optimus Prime
  • Drunk Cuts
    Drunk cuts are cuts
    That you get on your hands
    When you are all inebriated
    They go unnoticed
    Until the next morning
    When’s intoxication’s abated
    You might have tripped up some stairs
    Or taken a spill
    Or tried to open bottles you thought were twist-off
    Or broken some glass
    Or bitten a hangnail
    Or punched a door because you were pissed off
    Drunk cuts
    Drunk cuts are cuts
    You also get on your legs
    If you’ve fallen down and scrapped up a knee
    Or you might get drunk cuts
    If you fall off the hood
    Of the car on which you were taking a pee
    Or your flesh might get seared
    With demonic messages
    That happens sometimes when you’re possessed
    And you might nick yourself
    While you’re buying some chocolates
    For your girlfriend because she is the best
    Drunk cuts
  • Voicebox Botox
    Carnivorous beats and
    Caliginous meat
    Elective dentistry
    Ingest the enemy
    Carnivorous beats and
    Caliginous meat
    Devour my feet
    Carnivorous beats and

    Caliginous meat
    A vicious enterprise
    Lightly tenderized
    Carnivorous beats and
    Caliginous meat
    Reheat the concrete
    I wanna rock
    I wanna
    Voicebox botox
  • My Guy Died (Level 12 Human Sorcerer)
    We were fighting some trolls
    In the warrens below
    Getting close to our goal
    As far as I know
    My dude fails a roll
    And it knocks him prone
    No standards, moves or minors
    I was totally boned
    It was a critical hit
    From some little minimal shit
    When I heard those little dice click
    I threw a bit of a fit
    Instead of a saving throw
    Instead of a glancing blow
    No medical skills in tow
    I let my character go
    My guy died

    The coup de grâce came up
    On the 20th sideCrit
    He had
    11 strength
    13 con
    16 dex
    11 int
    9 wisdom
    23 charismaI play a minotaur now
    My guy died
    The coup de grâce came up
    On the 20th side
    My guy died
    No death save modifiers
    Could be applied
    My guy died
    That human saving throw bonus
    Couldn’t save me this time
  • You Have Found the Hawk’s Claw
    This wand in my hand
    In this mystical land
    Enchant & distract
    A draconic attack
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    Time to cast a magic spell
    On a chest
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    Hunting down thieves
    And ladies in leaves
    Portals & runes
    Ice arrow harpoons
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    Time to cast a magic spell
    On a chest
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
    I’ve got magic skills
    All the way from here to Budapest
    You have found the hawk’s claw
    On a quest
  • Wildness Acts
    I’m out here getting wild like a wild baboon
    Always throwing office parties in the filing room
    I got a shoebox of receipts from the jet ski place
    ‘Cause i rent jet skis like every day
    Gettin’ crazy all night long
    In gothic clubs
    Pickin’ daisies with these throngs
    Of panda cubs
    Kevin Spacey used some tongs
    In a British pub
    ‘Cause his steak was well done
    And too hot to pick up
    I’m wearing wildness slacks

    Committing wildness acts
    I’m wearing wildness slacks
    Committing wildness acts
    Guilty of wildness
    Guilty of acts
    Guilty of wild
    NES acts[whatever the hell xero is saying] Wild to the max with wildness acts
    I was experimented on by the government
    They tried to turn me into a rubber gent
    A rubber gent’s a dude who’s hella dapper
    And can bend in weird ways like he’s made of plastic
    I’m always back stage at festivals
    Getting bonkers with the bands and special guestivals
    I prefer my pizza with vegetables
    I got like three brain cells left inside my skull
  • Baby Jesus vs. Baby Genius
    Two babies had a fight
    In the motherfucking dirt
    And punched each other in the dick
    ‘Til their baby nipples hurt
    They had a fight
  • The First Band Ever to Play Resistanz Festival (We’re #1)
    You make a mix tape, you put the best song first
    And the guy who wins the race is the one who comes in first
    Even though we may not be known as well
    We’re still the first band to play Resistanz Festival
    We’re number one
    You rent some videos, you watch the best one first
    And picking kickball teams, you pick the best guy first
    The Gothsicles are opening on the first night
    Or late afternoon, to be technically right
    We’re number one
  • Holy Shit, We’re Playing Kinetik
    Montreal’s got a free for all
    In the form of an EBM festival
    With terror noise and power noise
    And a night of old skool industrial
    With food and booze and alcohol
    And their beer selection is the best of all
    But it looks like someone dropped the ball
    ‘Cause this year’s got The Gothsicles
    Holy shit,
    We’re playing Kinetik
    (That doesn’t rhyme)
    Holy shit,
    We’re playing Kinetik
    (With Edgey, Hocico and Dive)
    Vasi from Reaper thinks I look like Kurt Russell
    Which I don’t really get ’cause i don’t look like like Kurt Russell
    But I do smack hella suckers upside their face
    I got hella bad gas, but I start the party in this place
    Holy shit,
    We’re playing Kinetik
    (That doesn’t rhyme)
    Holy shit,
    We’re playing Kinetik
    (With Caustic, Combichrist and Dive)
    Holy shit,
    We’re playing Kinetik
    (Still doesn’t rhyme)
    Holy shit,
    We’re playing Kinetik
    (With Memmaker, ADR and Dive)Holy shit,
    We’re playing Kinetik

    On the same stage as Leaetherstrip

    And your band if I missed them

  • Jim, Let Me Know When You Can Drink Again
    I like getting wild with the occasional beer
    And fly on pure grain alcohol like the Rocketeer
    But then my wing man
    Was taken down at random
    I drink up all the Hennessey
    Ya got on ya shelf
    But I don’t wanna do that shit all by myself
    ‘Cause what I’m here to celebrate
    Has to happen in tandem
    So,Jim,
    Let me know when you can drink again
    ‘Cause we’ll take it to the brink again
    Extreme party stylezz
    Jim,
    Let me know when you can drink again
    ‘Cause we’ll take it to the brink again
    Party stylezz for miles
    We’ll barhop Pittsburgh ’til Monday comes
    Drinkin’ gin and beer and Everclear and vodka and rum
    And hey, since you’re back on you’re feet, I’ll pick up the tab
    And when i am sufficiently in party mode
    I’ll ask you some questions i’ve been wanting to know
    Like why the fuck your band shirt has some chick getting stabbed
    Party styles in this place
    Party styles in this time
  • Everyone Should Play V:TES (‘Cause Somebody’s Gotta Be Worse Than Me) – feat. Ben Peal
    It’s our designated weeknight
    Or weekend if you roll that way
    I brought a couple a’ beers
    But save like six for me, okay?
    ‘Cause like an adult swim
    I’m always out of the pool
    I got an academic hunting ground
    ‘Cause I’m always getting schooled
    I’ve got a history
    Of playing inadmissibly
    To any tournament I see
    ‘Cause I get killed by Chimerstry
    You’re thinking moves ahead
    I’m struggling with card text
    And trying to determine
    The effects of Rötshreck
    It’s got great group dynamics
    And that keeps me coming back
    Even though all I’m good at
    Is the pre-game talking smack
    I’ll threaten you
    With my brand new
    Inner Circle Toreador
    Then watch you pound me into the ground
    With cards from ’94I’ve got a history
    Of playing inadmissibly
    To any tournament I see
    ‘Cause I get killed by progeny
    You’re thinking moves ahead
    I’m struggling with card text
    And trying to determine
    Rötshreck’s effects
    I’ve got a history
    Of playing inadmissibly
    At every tournament I see
    ‘Cause I get killed by Thaumaturgy
    You’re thinking moves ahead
    I’m struggling with card text
    And wondering what horrid combo
    You’ll throw at me next

  • INFL8-R
    Subterranean
    Exterminator
    I’m witnessing you destroy
    Low-res
    Low-lives
    With the brutal means that you employ
    Incendiary
    Reptilians
    And those goggle-headed red round guys
    Broken skin
    From within
    Leading to internal pressure demise Inflate
    Your enemies until they
    Disincorporate
    Your hi-score means explode and
    Annihilate
    All you pursue because it’s
    Mr. See
    Mr. Do
    You’re through
    In these earthen tunnels
    Video passageways
    Only devastation to be found
    No Shock G
    No Humpty Hump
    In this digital underground
    Blood in
    Blood out
    Blood shooting out your eyes
    Dig in
    Dug out
    Out of time and out of extra lives
    No reset
    No restart
    Injected
    And torn apart

  • Second Album Means It’s Too Late to Change Your Band Name
    Remember your first email address?
    A memory that you might try to repress
    ‘Cause in 2001 at juno.com
    You were still known as gothicfairyprincess
    And I betcha somewhere you’d wish that you’d changed
    But to switch your email is a hell of a pain
    Recognition of the name goes down the drain
    And the whole thing holds true for band names, too
    Second time around means that your shit’s solidified
    ‘Cause by the second time around the sound’s by name identified
    And if you ever sought to alter that, you’d find yourself denied
    ‘Cause by the second time around you’ve wound the ropes by which you’re tied
    Second time around
    It’s constantly happening
    Bands always regretting
    The elected moniker
    By which they monitor
    The scene or register as their myspace thing
    ‘Cause I’ve heard that Tom Shear doesn’t like band name
    And I’ve read that Fat Mike has expressed much that same
    But both those bands are awesome so it’s like, ya know, whatever
    So yo, fuck it, “Gothsicles” forever
    Second time around means that your shit’s solidified
    ‘Cause by the second time around the sound’s by name identified
    And if you ever sought to alter that, you’d find yourself denied
    ‘Cause by the second time around, that appellation’s bound
    Second time around means that it’s too late to change your band name
  • Amphibious Trigonometry


    Monster school student bodies always seem to be diverse

    With like a mummy and a zombie and a demon student nurse

    And a mortician bus driver ’cause the bus is a hearse

    But one type of monster always has it the worst

     

    ‘Cause the werewolf guy’s gig is to howl at the moon

    And the vampire kid can make the ladies swoon

    But you’ll always wait for 3 in the afternoon

    If you’re the fish kid from the black lagoon

    ‘Cause you need

    Water to breathe

    Can’t take french 3

    Amphibiously

    Were you a zombie fish boy,

    Well then I ‘spose it wouldn’t matter

    As the undead do not require a breathing apparatus

    But I’ve never seen a revenant complete a swan dive

    Fish men maybe monsters, but they’re clearly alive

    Can’t be a football star like frankenstein

    The impact would surely crack your fragile spines

    Can’t be in the school play with the opera phantom nerds

    ‘Cause your aquatic vocal chords can’t ennuciate words

    Can’t get a steady girl or friend with benefits

    ‘Cause no lady likes a guy who’s been a fish

    But as marine based life, you can still take pride

    In fearing no swirly or bubbler ride

    ‘Cause you need

    Water to breathe

    Can’t take trigonometry

    Amphibiously

    Were you a zombie fish boy,

    Well then I ‘spose it wouldn’t matter

    As the undead do not require a breathing apparatus

    But I’ve never seen a revenant complete a swan dive

    Fish men maybe monsters, but they’re clearly alive

    And I’m glad they’re not zombies

    For I confess

    That I’m WAY DONE WITH ZOMBIES

    But I digress

    The point is that school will make you depressed

    If you’ve got gills on your face and scales on your chest

  • Karma Jolt


    Dragon Feet

    You die

    Texas Boots

    You die

    Zeus’ Wand

    You die

    Life meter undermined

     

    Javelin Man

    You die

    A Grand Slam

    You die

    Fatal Steps

    You still die

    In the absence of supplies

    No time to fuck about

    Max power is maxed out

    Karma Jolt

    Flip for it like Acro Circus

    Mightier than any Zerg rush

    Karma Jolt

    The smiles are free

    But the death is still cheap

    If restoratives

    Are not what you keep

    Against the Jocks

    You die

    Against the Squids

    You die

    Against the Mob

    You die

    Coinage bisectified

    Against the Plague

    You die

    Against Cowboys

    You die

    Against Homeboys

    You still die

    And you only get one guy

    No time to fuck about

    Max power is maxed out

    Karma Jolt

    Healthier than brussel sprouts

    Max power is maxed out

    Karma Jolt

    Tricklin’ down ya throat

    With a Karma Jolt

    Drink it up

    Just one taste

    Of that bubbling karma crude

    Is complete stamina points

    So you disarm a dude

    And take all of his change

    After he’s ceased to be alive

    And walk up to the counter

    And drop $15.25

    A jolt of karma in the arm allows for furtherance of harm

    A jolt of karma in the arm allows for furtherance of harm

    A jolt of karma in the arm allows for furtherance of harm

    A jolt of karma in the arm, a karma jolt

  • Eff the Sun


    Like a corrupt data compiler

    We’re gonna mess up

    That ball of fire

     

    Douse the power it requires

    Video games all day

    No prior

    Kulcha

    Was ever glare free

    Those little light bursts

    Bouncing off the screen

    Annoying

    To the nth degree

    That’s why the sun is gonna get one toll free

    Bomb blast

    In the precise vicinity

    To nullify negative charge

    For all infinity

    Cascade effects

    Chain reactions

    Atomic level annihilation

    To eff the sun

    Eff the sun

    Anti solar sentiment

    Is nothing new

    But my ostentatious arguments necessitate review

    My chief argument is

    That the sun eats poo

    And all gets up in my eyes

    When I play faxanadu

    And through

    A telescope

    I calculate

    The absolute destruction of all solar real estate

    And wait

    While the platform rises

    With more destructive force than 8 starship Enterprises

    But crap

    The hydraulics are broken

    Need to call tech support at the place I bought it from

    But the guy on the line is a freakin’ jerk

    Man, I just need the lifting platform to work

    Reboot the machine, wait the for start up chimes

    Alright we’re all good, now it’s finally time

    Eternal darkness

    ‘Cause the sun’s all charred

    Put the text of this song on a V:TES card

    Eff the sun

  • BAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLSSSS (Prometheus Burning vs. The Gothsicles)


    BAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLSSSS

     

    3D circles

    Orbs & spheres

    In your face

    And in your ears

    3D circles

    Orbs & globes

    In your grill

    And on your lobes

    It’s

  • mindFluxFuneral owes me like $100


    Out on my lunch break

    Headed to the Chinese place for some delicious take

    Out but to my surprise

    I was to be penalized

    By a radar pair of eyes

     

    Birthmark playing in the car

    That fourth track is

    Worth four stars

    And then there was that officaaar

    Listenin’ to mindFlux

    And spendin’ the big bucks

    Pulled over by the law

    That ticket was bullshit

    And I shoulda fought it

    But it was in Waukesha

    But the point is you made me

    ‘Cause that songs kicks crazy

    Much amounts of ass

    Thereby, I attest to thee

    You’re an accessory

    To my driving slightly fast

    So this one’s on you

    This one’s on you

    Then years later at Chicago’s Darkroom

    I’m approached by a singer guy I recognize and subsequently with whom

    I converse & try to get reimbursed

    To get some money back into my wallet

    He’s like “Huh?” I’m like “Yeah” he’s like “No” I’m like “Cool”

    “‘Cause i was just kidding about it”

    He’s like “Dude man, that sucks, and you’re not alone.

    Skinny Puppy’s had me passing dudes in no passing zones.

    So here’s some advice of comparable value:

    Write about that shit”

    …I think i’ll write about that shit.

    AND I TEAR YOU APART (lyrics from mFF’s “Dream It Dead”, the song this song is kind of about)

  • Nine Dudes Freaking Out

     

    Freaking out

    Getting wild

    Getting wild

    Freaking out

    Freaking out

    Getting wild

    Getting wild and freaking out

    Ramp the wacky up

    Nine dudes freaking out

    And going berzerk

    Nine dudes throwing down

    And going to work

    A small percentage of the place

    All getting wild

    A booth in the back is where the coats are piled

    Shake your sillies out

    It’s what I’m all about

    Basic masonry

    Requires grout

    A small percentage of the place

    All getting wild

    By the 14th of April

    Have your taxes filed

    The next morning, go out

    Get you something to eat

    Oh man, mimosas and a hostess cake or

    Breakfast burrito

    And it’s only when the server staff

    Shows up with your food

    That the door gets knocked down

    And in rush nine dudes

  • I Thought the CD Player Was Broken…But it was Just a Cyanotic Song (feat. Cyanotic)

     

    Hey, what’s that noise?

    The CD player’s busted

    Or the CD’s scratched up

    And shitcake encrusted

    Oh wait

    It’s just on shuffle

    And a Cyanotic track

    Is causing kerfluffles

    With stuttery takes

    And skippery sounds

    They wouldn’t take this CD

    At the Disc-Go-Round

    ‘Cause they only stake stuff

    That’s free of scratches

    And after a second of this

    My ear lobe detaches

    It’s like Pantera at a hip hop show

    Or terminators driving down a bumpy road

    Or Robocop with a ruptured spleen

    Or someone who’s role model is a machine

    Hey, you know that one Cyanotic band?

    They’re the guys with the moving keyboard stand

    We’re doing a collab with them on our second disc

    And the lead singer sounds just like this

    We’re doing a collab with that Cyanotic band

    Careful, keyboard guy, or you’ll crush your hands

    It just might be the hottest track on the disc

    And the lead singer screams just like thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-i-i-i-i-i-s

     

  • DEATHKEY

    Everybody’s all takin’ ’bout DEATHKEY

    But I don’t even know what that means

    Is it music? No, it’s too noisey

    DEATHKEY

    Some guy all tryin’ to be creepy

    Posting his rants and bandname repetitively

    From his parents’ basement, on his mom’s PC

    DEATHKEY

    I’m on the Side-Line boards

    I got machete swords

    Express my mental block

    By way of Caps Lock

    It spread across the web like it was grape jelly

    It’s everywhere like ninjas and zombies

    So viral, the doc just diagnosed me

    DEATHKEY

    Now every morning my inbox is at capacity

    I look why and then I cry “ZOMG”

    A thousand blog comments and this is how they all read:

    DEATHKEY

    I’m on the Side-Line boards

    I got machete swords

    Express my mental block

    By way of Caps Lock

    My bullshit was so extreme,

    My band is now an internet meme

    So on every forum thread

    Forget the topic

    Reply with DEATHKEY instead

  • I Can Tell You Shop At Hot(t) Topic

     


    I know where you got that T-Shirt

    I know where you got those boots

    I know where you got that tote bag

    Touting your Nintendo roots

    And I’m aware of the location

    Of just where you got those pants

    And the tribute compilation with the

    Cleopatra bands, bands, bands

    I can tell that you, that you shop at Hot(t) Topic

    ‘Cause you look sorta skater punk rock and 40% gothic

    I’m not making any judgments here,

    I just know where you bought it

    ‘Cause I can tell that you, that you shop at Hot(t) Topic

    I can tell that you, that you shop at Hot(t) Topic

    ‘Cause you look sorta skater punk rock and kinda, sorta gothic

    It’s not parody or sarcasm

    It’s only to observe

    That the source of your clothes

    Is quite easy to discern

  • Triple Shot


    Arcade alteration’s on the menu for tonight

    And Galaga’s the target for a massive weapons hike

    Still got no up and down flight path, just horizontal scrolling

    But we’ll still upgrade the armament for outer space patrolling

    ‘Cause tonight we’re going overboard, tonight you’re getting rocked

    Because we’ve got a firepower surplus to allot

    Mosquito alien insectoids are now gonna thrice swat

    With one hundred percent acc-u-ra-cy on the dot

    Triple shot

    Triple shot

    You try to defend but you cannot

    Triple shot

    Three conjoined battleships is what I got

    Triple shot

    Triple shot

    You try to defend but you cannot

    Triple shot

    Three conjoined fighter ships is what I got

    Without connected space vessels, bloodlust goes unassuaged

    And mono monster mashing always makes for a “challenging stage”

    But despite the symphony of destruction from my two-pronged attacks

    True lethal harmony was out because a duet was the max

    ‘Cause only double ships in Galaga could previously be attained

    But tonight a new joint wingman to the existing two is gained

    ‘Cause when the forces of the arcade meet our industrial electro

    The result is an unstoppable artillery trifecto

    Triple shot

    Triple shot

    You try to defend, but you cannot

    Try to get back to the top of the screen:

    You get jack squat

     

  • Turn Signals Are Still Cool


  • When you’re in a lane
    And youSuddenly deviateYou make me feel ashamedFor my ownWisconsin license plateI can’t read your mindI’m not inThe Psychic Friends NetworkSo you must signal your directional intentionsOr watch me go berserk(On you)In the lanesYou must signalOn the off-rampYou still must signalYou demonstrate your gaping lack of any driving skill’Cause turn signals are not optionalThe lines on the road areClearly marked, but you’reDrifting like a raftHow did you ever get a valid driver’s license?Was it blackmail, bribery or witchcraft?

    And if the lead guy at the light

    Gets his left signal on too late

    Make sure you get that blinker on

    Before you circumnavigate

    This is the type thing that

    Shouldn’t be so hard

    I don’t think it’s that hard

    Is it really that hard?

  • One Second Ghost

  • All eight bits of meAre solidlyCommitted to side-scrollingAnd no enemiesCan vanquish meOr the power I’m controllingBut I suddenly scream “Shit!””Because my guy has just been hitWith my hits points indicator less than fullBut it’s quite inconsequentialAnd my wrath will be torrentialFor the following one secondI am in-vin-ci-a-ble(’cause I’m a)One SecondOne Second GhostOne SecondOne Second GhostThe cause of my awesomeNESHas been diagnosed(’cause I’m a)One Second

    One Second Ghost

    Post contact I am flashing

    And on the screen I’m dashing

    ‘Cause my time as a specter is so limited

    But even though I’ve just been damaged

    I turn that to my advantage

    You can’t stop this platform gaming rivethead

    (’cause I’m a)

    One Second

    One Second Ghost

    The cause of your imminent death

    Has been diagnosed

    One Second

    One Second Ghost

    You try to do me in

    Well almost

    You get

    Vengeance from the other side

    Where pixel poltergeists reside

    It’s the power you play with

    When you play Nintendo

    So take this song as a tutorial

    For going incorporeal

    ‘Cause if you strike me down

    I’ll rise like a crescendo

     

  • English License


    Now don’t get me wrong

    When you hear this song

    ‘Cause I got five Project Pitchfork CDs on my desk

    Playing more than occasionally

    XMTP MP3s

    But we’re the English Police,

    and you’re under arrest!

    First off, the letter “V”

    Is pronounced differently

    Than the way in which the letter “W” is said

    Such linguistic mistakes

    Should be harder to make

    If you called up an American goth and got your shit proofread!

    Chorus:

    For crimes of crappy lyrics that don’t make any sense

    Your judgment has been made and it decrees that forth hence

    Project Pitchfork, E-Craft, and Funker Vogt

    Your English License has been revoked!

    For crimes of crappy lyrics that don’t make any sense

    Your judgment has been made and it decrees that forth hence

    Neuroticfish and E-Craft, and Funker Vogt

    Your English License has been revoked!

    And I will concede

    That I will stomp ’till I bleed

    To your music ’cause I’m not a hater

    But it’s hard sound tough,

    Even vocoding wont’ be enough,

    If your lyrics are written by a first grader

    But I’ll let you off with a warning

    If you promise me one thing:

    That you’ll figure out what the proper syllables to accent are

    ‘Cause your looped layers of static

    Will sound more dramatic

    When you don’t sing like a goddamn dork…ALLES KLAR?

    (chorus)

    Breakdown:

    Bands are on the run from the grammatical police

    For their own good, we gotta find and fix mistakes from Germanese

    No more changing words to make a rhyme or rhyming same words twice

    ‘Cause it’s possible write a hit were the words aren’t sacrificed

    Soon we’re gonna go put other places to the test

    By fixing up their lyrics, Scandanavia is next

    Making yudgments on the quality of lyrical esteem

    Chopping up shitty lyrics with a guil-e-o-tine

    The right accents aren’t required to garner our approval

    But singing like an idiot means license removal

    And I aware of my own lyrical shortcomings

    Pronunciation errors that knock me out the running

    Saying Funker, not “Foonkah”, when I know that that is wrong

    Showing blatant hypocrisy within my own damn song

    But I’ll make an effort and strain

    To get it right on the refrain

    And here it comes again

    So raise your voice (not woice) and sing along!

    (chorus x2)

  • Hey, I’ve Got That Font

     

    The boss isn’t looking

    So I use my screen

    For browsing an online music magazine

    And there I see a thing

    That I can’t believe

    There are still band logos made with Ogilvie

    ’cause me,

    I’m something of a typeface connoisseur

    I eat chicken wing dings with my font du jour [tofu chicken]

    And I can spot your shitty fonts like a cheap toupee

    And still blow you away

    With my Arial display

    And when it comes to fonts,

    I annihilate

    And when I print my fonts,

    I always collate

    Some are narrow and condensed,

    Others heavyweight

    And I’m more gothic

    Than any Copperplate

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    And a full directory of all the TrueType you could want

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    They used Alleycat to advertise that local restaurant

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    With bolds and italics from here to Vermont

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    Creepygirl and Rockwell, I’m a fuckin’ font savant

    There are so many fonts that I recognize

    Zoom in all you want, they won’t pixelize

    ‘Cause I know the good shit from the replicas

    I’ll see you in Helvetica

    and then a

    Big fucking axe will cut off your hands

    You used to be serif, but now you’re sans

    And I got plans to make that font

    Used by Mickey D’s

    I’ll trace it out with the blood

    From where your hands used to be

    I customized a font so each serif ends in a hook

    But your custom font looks like gobbledygook

    And that’s not Eras Lite but Eras Medium that you mistook

    And I’m more gothic

    Than any Franklin Book

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    And a full directory of all the TrueType you could want

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    They used Alleycat to advertise that local restaurant

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    If there was a typeface army, then I’d be the commandant

    Hey, I’ve Got That Font

    I sell ’em to pay off my Mitsubishi Galant

    Morpheus

    Times New Roman

    Ultraworld

    Bookman Old Style

    Garamond

    Liquidism

    Comic, Bloody, Impact

    Verdana

    Goudy Stout

    Century Gothic, Bauhaus

    Joystix

    Buffy

    Liquidism 2

    Metal Lord

    Courier New

     

  • Mix This Song Into A23’s “Maps of Reality”

     

    If you’re gonna get paid

    For playing other people’s music

    You’ll probably wanna add some zing

    And here’s one way to do it

    And I know that fancy mixing

    Doesn’t always make a good DJ

    But still, my mom could put a CD in a deck

    And make it play

    “Maps of Reality”

    By Assemblage 23

    Has the same BPM

    And is in the same key

    As the track which you are hearing now

    It’s Beat Match 101

    We’ll synchronize

    The song’s reprise

    And then we’ll have some fun

    Because it’s like a paint by numbers

    Except for the DJ booth

    Because a pause that lasts two seconds

    Just sounds sloppy and uncouth

    We’ll make a beat match so precise

    You’ll leave the dancefloor thunderstruck

    Because our mash-up will be organized

    And not just sheer (Shear?) luck

    “Maps of Reality”

    By Assemblage 23

    Is the subject of this mix

    Because I think that song is neat

    So whoever’s at the decks,

    Prepare to bring the real beat back

    And cue it up to 9.7 seconds into the track

    Because it’s like a paint by numbers

    Except for the disc jockey

    ‘Cause two shoes in a dryer

    Pisses off my Tamagotchi

    But train wrecks can be avoided

    And we’re here to show you how

    So miss or mister DJ,

    Drop the beat…*NOW*

    Main synth in 5 4 3 2

    And cue Tom’s vocals

    We’ll end this shit when we reach the chorus

  • Better Versions By Other People


    Better versions by

    Other people

    Bigger beats and better synths

    And at least twice as evil

    Probably gonna overshadow mine

    But it’s worth the risk

    Just to get a few more tracks

    On this goddamn disc

    Better versions by

    Other people

    When other people do the work

    It turns out much less feeble

    Should you hear this CD in a club

    It should be no surprise

    It’s gonna be one these tracks

    By these other guys

  • Holy Shit, We’re Playing Infest!


  • Who is this band?
    I never heard them beforeMust’ve snuck into InfestThrough the back doorAnd now we’re on the billThat your admission paid forSo excuse me for a second while i freak out hardcoreHoly shitHoly shitHoly shitWe’re playing InfestTwo Nintendo nerdsFrom the American midwestHoly shitHoly shitWe’re playing infestI can’t believe it eitherIt’s like we’re dream achieversWere this is television i would adjust my receiverNeither rain nor sleet nor ice nor snowCould keep us from this showWe’d even take a flight

    That’s flying into Heathrow

    Last night I got so anxious

    I threw up and made a mess

    And now we’re here to commandeer

    The fruits of your interest

    Get ready for

    The final inquest

    Holy shit

    Holy shit

    Welcome to Infest

  • Theme From “So You’ve Decided To Become A Goth”
    Congratulations, I hear you’re goth now
    But if you are just tuning in
    Well let me tell you how
    To be all creepy
    Industrial and gothic
    Just have a seat and
    Rewatch the filmstrip
    So you want
    So you want to become a goth
    Discover 80s icons apart from David Lee Roth
    And other things that you learn when you become a goth
    Not quite emo-ite
    Poseur or nu-metal
    And is here underscored
    By Hanzl und Gretyl
    So stayed tuned in our seriesOf gothic educationNext we’ll cover hi-hats, kick drumsAnd arpeggiationSo you want

  • So you want to become a gothDiscover 80s icons apart from David Lee RothAnd other things that you learn when you become a goth

    So you want

    So you want to become a goth

    Hear music colder than ice planet Hoth

    And other things that you learn when you become a goth

    Or buy Funker Vogt instead

    To become a rivet head

    Order now for a free DVD

    Of Dawn of the Dead

  • Konami Code (III and IV)

     

    Contra! 30 Guys!

    Enter in this code for thirty lives!

    Contra! 30 Guys!

    Punch in the code for thirty lives!

    UP UP DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT B A SELECT START

    Contra! 30 Guys!

    The following code makes the body count rise!

  • Sonic Boom!

     

     

    Micah! You look like-ah

    Streetfighter!

    Micah! You look like-ah

    You’re 16 bits on a Super Nintendo!

    You spike your hair in such a way,

    It’s blonde and sharp and pointy

    And it makes me want to say:

    SONIC BOOM!

    Cruc’ Injection!

    Entering the room,

    Throwing catchy synth hooks at tremendous volume!

    Spikey blonde hair that’s pointy and well groomed,

    You cannot withstand the industrial

    SONIC BOOM!

    Micah! You look like-ah

    Flashkicker!

    Micah! You look like-ah

    You’re gonna hit M. Bison with a medium punch!

    You spike your hair in such a way,

    I hold back for two seconds

    Push forward and A!

    SONIC BOOM!

  • Devastator

     

    Autobots are going down

    ‘Cause there’s an evil giant robotic

    New kid in town!

    Constructicons

    Form to create

    The amalgemous monstrosity that Autobots hate!

    Right arm is formed by Scavenger!

    Left leg is formed by Mixmaster!

    Scrapper, Long Haul, Bone Crusher

    Make up the rest!

    Hook creates the head that heroes detest!

    DEVASTATOR!

    Constructicons in battle

    With the Dinobots!

    They kick and claw and tear and share

    Commercial spots!

    But the forces of evil

    Rule the scene

    With an iron fist

    That’s purple and green!

    Right arm is formed by Scavenger!

    Left leg is formed by Mixmaster!

    Scrapper, Long Haul, Bone Crusher

    Make up the rest!

    Hook creates the head that snaps on to his chest!

    DEVASTATOR!